Understanding men and dating articles

Getting closer — if it's going to happen — has to be HIS idea.

Remember, he has already placed you into some category, based on his instinctive assessment.

Now that you understand a man’s highly compartmentalized psyche, use this expert tip in your next relationship: You aren’t threatened by his boundaries, because you understand this is how he copes with new emotions and experiences.

At the beginning of a relationship, he’s not ready to let you free-range across his thoughts. Your actions will speak to him on a deep level, in a way that insisting on connection can’t.

Consider these 3 observations: It is reflexive — he’s often not aware that he’s doing it.

Because it feels uncomfortable for us, we have a hard time accepting that it can be part of a healthy strategy for managing strong emotions.

From a man’s perspective, it’s reasonable to keep you in that box, peeking inside only when he feels like it.

In fact, women who never learn to compartmentalize feelings at ALL are at risk of letting others free-range over them like a doormat; or wasting time on fantasy relationships; or becoming consumed with romantic obsessions.

For most men, some compartmentalization is part of a normal coping strategy.

To better understand these masculine boundaries — which women often mistake for emotional unavailability — I invite you to examine compartmentalization from both male and female perspectives.

Don’t let any new relationship completely take over your thoughts or seep into other areas of your life.

Follow The Rules and you'll create just the right amount of distance to observe clearly which box he has placed you in.

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When he feels like opening the box and enjoying the contents, he does.

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